The year has barely started and I’ve broken relationship.

So I have had this Facebook friend from years back, can’t say precisely, but I noticed him in the year 2012, he was trying to establish conversation, but I wasn’t really paying attention. I noticed however that he was from my village but We did not know each other personally, we had a lot of mutual friends from my village so I knew he had to be from my place.

Late last year, a day after Christmas, he messaged me, a good will message, I responded in like manner, and we spent the next three or four hours chatting, he was mainly trying to know my parents, relationships status, etc.He knew my family, and some of my cousins, one of my cousins is married into his family, so he knew where I came from, on the other hand, I didn’t know his family because, I don’t know much people in my village so whoever he tries to describe about his family, I told him I would ask my mum if she knows them.

Middle of the night, my mum entered my room to gist, she probably had passed to use the toilet and saw my phone light on, indicating that I was awake, so she came in.

Do you know so so and so family, I asked her?

He said they were all born in kaduna and aunty Christie’s daughter is married to his uncle.

She knows them, their family is good , but she doesn’t know his own father in particular...... did he say he wants to marry you? Nooooh we are just chatting as people from the same village...... their family is good she said repeatedly........ if he asks you to come to kaduna don’t go..oh, it is man that looks for woman and not the other way round.....

Me : when did we get here? ( in my head)

Mummy anything that is beyond Abuja, I no Dey go...... before kidnappers will catch me on the road thinking I have money.

So we kept talking, he wanted me to let him know, when I get back to Abuja from the east, and I was returning the next day being 27th, so we kept in touch through my journey till I got here..... by the third day , we were talking like three four time in a day, no calls yet oh or even trying to get my number, by this time he had told me he’s an automobile mechanic, he graduated from the open university, and he communicates and expresses himself well in English...... even though some of his responses seemed a little bit choreographed, example, when I told him, I had gone for a three months personal course outside Abuja that’s not related to my work, his response was.

“That's awesome 👍

Personal development very essential for success!👍”

He further asked if I got relief from my office before I left and I said ,I did not write but I informed my boss verbally ........

He responded with

“Wow!.. that means you're loyal to authority 🤔👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏”

Days went by and he has not asked for my mobile to call, and I somewhat started drawing the map on how we both can get to Canada with his automobile mechanic skill...

But brother is talking much but saying nothing,

Morning greetings, midday, “how is you day going?” And how was your day at night was all taking place..... and I didn’t know exactly what to call this...... I Began to slow down the pace of my responses. But as someone who is on a journey to develop my communication skills, I decided to not to let this one slide or let this wither away with lack of responses from my side which is usually my style.

So , on the 6th day of our chatting , he asked if I had eaten, for some reason I consider that line ‘cliche’ perhaps I’ve heard it too much or I consider it as the type of communication that lacks depth, it’s more or less like talking about the weather to me, I responded in the affirmative but did not let up what I had eaten. And he was pressed to know....... we hung around there for a while, then he asked another question, which was much more personal, it’s something you don’t need to know if you’re not my trusted date, and he has not even asked to date moi...... This was my chance to ask him what his stakes are? Why did you ask me this question, what is your purpose for wanting to know? He said, because he wants to be a “good friend” mhnnn ........ breathes out, that was not what I was hoping for, but thank God I asked, so all this good morning, good afternoon, good evening, have you eaten? Trying to know my parents in particular...... was just to be good friend?? Brother! I have enough friends already..... number 2 , don’t message me 3 to 4 times daily or at 6 am in the morning, establishing a whole presence in my mind just to be a true friend, Biko kwusi that nonsense!

Going forward for a friend that I have not met besides Facebook and coming from the same village...... you can only message me twice a month, I told him. And he bid me bye and asked that I enjoy myself.

This is how I started my year with a broken relationship or whatever that was, it’s far better than having breakfast a month, three months or whenever later in the year.